Drive a Little...Save a Ghetto

I hate Monday's...I mean really I do! It's the first day back to work from a much needed weekend. Usually Mondays are loaded down with paperwork, meetings, and anticipation to get it over with and get home. The only thing that can make Mondays worse than they already are is a lazy weekend....which only adds to an already stressful and ample day. This was my Monday this week....

I was soooo lazy this past weekend. My daughter was sick, and of course...when she is sick, she becomes an even more so "Mommy Tick". Otherwise, she is stuck to me like a fat tick on a dog. I am by no means complaining...I love being there for her, and really do enjoy just lounging around with her, but there is one downfall to laying around in your jammies watching Spongebob all day on Sunday...no housework or errands get done....making this past Monday a very busy, eventful day!

On the drive home from work, my mind was racing with all the shit  stuff  I had to do when I got home. Wash clothes, wash dishes, mop the floors, cook supper, go to the grocery, bath the rug rat...& on & on. After the 20 minute ride, I pretty much had a game plan on how to get all this accomplished in one afternoon. I, my friend, was on a mission when I walked into the door....

Start a load of clothes - check
Start supper - check
Wash clothes - check
Feed the Family - check
Mop the Floors - check
Grocery ...... uuuummm, "RAIINNNYYY!! You want to go to the grocery store with Momma?" It's not that I particularly enjoy sneaking stuff out of the buggy that she snuck in, while she's not looking...but I figured if she went with me, then my floors might actually dry without little feet prints all over it.

I normally go to Food Lion to grocery shop. It is one of three choices in Scottsville. 1)Houchens-too high, 2)Food Lion-still too high but offers MVP/Discount cards & is much cleaner than it's competitors, 3)Save A Lot-about as dirty as it is cheap. Unfortunately, Save A Lot is located nearest to my house & I was in a hurry....so Save A Lot it was.

The only upside to my choice of stores was, we fit the bill...I looked like death warmed over & Carston looked like her head had not been combed in a month....so we blended in well with the environment. Our shopping experience didn’t last too long because I mainly only shopped for canned goods & some frozen items. Lord knows, I wasn't about to buy any meat or produce there. I didn't really notice anyone else shopping while we were there...it was pretty vacant, until we were at the register... that's when I learned I was much more grown and mature than I once was......

A young girl was ringing us up and Carston had handed her some candy in the middle of swiping my grocery items. Upon handing the candy back to Carston, the young girl commented on how polite Carston was for saying please and thank you without being prompted. (It shocked me as well)....when all of a sudden "SHE" strolled up, talking screaming on a cell phone in foreign tongue....OMG!

I have seen alot of different characters in my day, even strive on the fact that I am can fit in with most crowds & clicks...a chameleon so to speak, but I had never seen this before! This is when I learned what a "white-wanna-be-a Mexican-lady" was. I mean, I didn't even know they existed. She had her hair pulled back in a tight pony tail...greased back, and intentionally speaking, in a very boisterous voice, Spanish into a dinosaurs cell phone. Man she was chicken necking, gringo this, pinche that...when all of a sudden, she paused....rolled back her eyes....and in English, with a Spanish accent of course, said into the phone....."Ewww, all dez white peoplez be starin at me just cuz i be taukin in spannnnishh.....Ewww, I hate me summ white peoplez".....

I know my face lit up 10 shades of red....I looked at the young cashier and sure enough, she had the WTF look on her face too. I turned toward this lady, and the words were on the tip of my tongue... "The reason people are staring at you is because you are screaming on the phone making an ass of yourself, not because you are speaking Spanish you dumb bitch!".  Just as I was about to say it, Carston pulled on my arm...."Mommy, can I have some quarters for the machine(gumball)...I want a toy". Thank God she was with me, or I am sure one of two things would have happened.... 1) I would have whipped her ass and went to jail, or 2)She would of whipped my ass and I would have went to jail, either way I would have went to jail and my ice cream would have melted.....